I finally have my computer hooked up to the internet here at my mom's house, and in celebration I decided to abuse the dog.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
One night only!
Jason and I, along with several other people, are showing stuff in an art show on Sunday night, October 25th. If you're in the Birmingham area and want to come, get in touch with me for directions and shit. I'll have tons of new jewelry, and Jason painted a brand new piece just for this show.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Gretchen, the wonderasshole.
This is my mom's dog Gretchen. Yesterday I took her and Duque over to our old house to let them run around in our fenced back yard. OF COURSE, Gretchen managed to get out of the fence.
Cut to Lindsey and me, driving around the neighborhood slowly, hollering and whistling out my windows. We discover Gretchen, sleeping peacefully in the sun in someone else's driveway about three blocks from my house. Lindsey catches her, and promptly loses hold, and then we're running through people's back yards trying to catch her. We end up in a back yard where a dude is sitting peacefully on his back porch, and he smiles and waves and half-heartedly calls Gretchen to see if she'll come to him.
Eventually we corner her in his front yard up against his porch, but alas, I've left the leash in the car (4 houses down), and so I have to pick her up and carry her squirming to the car.
It was fun.
But now I have to go. She's gotten away from my mom's house, and I have to go and try to catch her.
Cut to Lindsey and me, driving around the neighborhood slowly, hollering and whistling out my windows. We discover Gretchen, sleeping peacefully in the sun in someone else's driveway about three blocks from my house. Lindsey catches her, and promptly loses hold, and then we're running through people's back yards trying to catch her. We end up in a back yard where a dude is sitting peacefully on his back porch, and he smiles and waves and half-heartedly calls Gretchen to see if she'll come to him.
Eventually we corner her in his front yard up against his porch, but alas, I've left the leash in the car (4 houses down), and so I have to pick her up and carry her squirming to the car.
It was fun.
But now I have to go. She's gotten away from my mom's house, and I have to go and try to catch her.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Slowly getting back to normal. Whatever that is.
We're slowly but surely getting all our things moved in at my mom's house. GAH, we have a lot of shit. I mean, loads and loads of shit.
We've moved most of the furniture, and our artwork, our books, our movies. And, while we've moved some of our clothes, HOLY CRAP at all the clothes we still have to move. And I have seriously already donated about 10 garbage bags full of clothes, shoes, and purses to Goodwill. For fuck's sakes, I don't know how we had it all in our house to begin with.
Duque is settling in especially well here. He's had a lightness about him, a spring in his step, that I've never seen before. He can play with Gretchen (my mom's Jack Russell terrier), or her abundance of cats. I think he really loves that, so far, he's been sleeping in our bedroom floor instead of his crate.
Reed loves this, loves living at Ma's house, and our only problem with him so far is that he is determined to sleep with Ma every night. We're working on getting him to sleep in his own room, and I'm hoping that's going to happen before we all go crazy.
Anyway, boring post, I know, but that's what's going on over here. What's going on with you?
We've moved most of the furniture, and our artwork, our books, our movies. And, while we've moved some of our clothes, HOLY CRAP at all the clothes we still have to move. And I have seriously already donated about 10 garbage bags full of clothes, shoes, and purses to Goodwill. For fuck's sakes, I don't know how we had it all in our house to begin with.
Duque is settling in especially well here. He's had a lightness about him, a spring in his step, that I've never seen before. He can play with Gretchen (my mom's Jack Russell terrier), or her abundance of cats. I think he really loves that, so far, he's been sleeping in our bedroom floor instead of his crate.
Reed loves this, loves living at Ma's house, and our only problem with him so far is that he is determined to sleep with Ma every night. We're working on getting him to sleep in his own room, and I'm hoping that's going to happen before we all go crazy.
Anyway, boring post, I know, but that's what's going on over here. What's going on with you?
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Cleaning out my text messages.
- So, everyone has nipple hair. I feel so vindicated.
- BE COOL IS IT THE FUZZ
- I wouldn't talk to Alan Hunter about Mtv because I try not to reward people's mediocrity. How sad it must be to have peaked in the 80's.
- This thing is kind of a celebration in kissing your own ass. I've never seen so many self important assholes walking around, smiling smugly at one another.
- I just got Chik Fil A because I was craving it like a business of ferrets.
- I guess my dead Phish spell hasn't quite kicked in yet.
- You have no idea how often I've wished you were here this afternoon specifically to YELL shitty dick at people.
- I AM LIKE CUCUMBER
- I just had a shot of tequila. You people should be concerned.
- 'slam on my breaks'- is that like 'devaining shrimp'?
- I am craving a hillock of beans.
- A hotdog just told me to do the wave.
- My lovecan's wasted.
- BE COOL IS IT THE FUZZ
- I wouldn't talk to Alan Hunter about Mtv because I try not to reward people's mediocrity. How sad it must be to have peaked in the 80's.
- This thing is kind of a celebration in kissing your own ass. I've never seen so many self important assholes walking around, smiling smugly at one another.
- I just got Chik Fil A because I was craving it like a business of ferrets.
- I guess my dead Phish spell hasn't quite kicked in yet.
- You have no idea how often I've wished you were here this afternoon specifically to YELL shitty dick at people.
- I AM LIKE CUCUMBER
- I just had a shot of tequila. You people should be concerned.
- 'slam on my breaks'- is that like 'devaining shrimp'?
- I am craving a hillock of beans.
- A hotdog just told me to do the wave.
- My lovecan's wasted.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
"Who says I can't get stoned; pick my nose in my house alone."
So, then, here I am at my mom's house. We're about half-way moved in, and everything is hectic and mixed up and every time we need something- clean underwear, socks, toothbrush- we have to figure out if it's here or there.
This is the part I hate about moving: moving.
What's cool about moving in here is that my mom has internet. INTERNET! How I've missed you. It's been right about one year since we lost internet at our house; one year since I've been able to roll out of bed and check my email, or read my favorite blogs, or job search, or write something new here. I'm looking forward to being able to do that again.
Plus, you know, PORN. Gotta love the porn.
Okay, I've got Jason dancing around in his underwear singing John Mayer right now. I've gotta go.
This is the part I hate about moving: moving.
What's cool about moving in here is that my mom has internet. INTERNET! How I've missed you. It's been right about one year since we lost internet at our house; one year since I've been able to roll out of bed and check my email, or read my favorite blogs, or job search, or write something new here. I'm looking forward to being able to do that again.
Plus, you know, PORN. Gotta love the porn.
Okay, I've got Jason dancing around in his underwear singing John Mayer right now. I've gotta go.
Wednesday, October 07, 2009
Tuesday, October 06, 2009
We'll all float on anyway.
Hm, where to start? I've already written about getting laid off, and about my uncle dying. Let's see; what else?
Well, on Friday we got a letter in the mail that our house has been foreclosed, and that we have ten days (until October 10th) to vacate. PARTY, right? So we've been planning and packing and trying to figure out how to fit all of us into my mother's house. It's not that small of a house, it's just the plan of action, and figuring where to put all our shit- really that should be ALL OUR SHIT EXCLAMATION- once we get there.
So this morning I called the lawyer for the mortgage company to find out if that date, October 10th, was the definite date we had to be out, because if we could get even a couple more days it would make things so much easier for us. The attorney said that we should call our mortgage company and ask for an extended vacate period, that they do that all the time, that it's nothing out of the ordinary. So I called Citimortgage at the number he gave me and spoke to Avery, who had no idea what I was talking about, and that I should call Joe X- I'm not shitting you, JOE X is who I should talk to. So I called the number Avery gave me for JOE X, and Kathy answered and said she had never heard of JOE X, and that the number I called was her direct line and she had never heard of a JOE X and that she doesn't work with loans and I could try Safeguard, the property management company. So I called Safeguard, and the girl there told me they had nothing to do with any of it, and I should talk to my mortgage company. THANKS. So I called the mortgage company again and spoke with a girl who said that there's nothing they could do; had we asked for assistance they might have been able to help us out. I said, "We DID ask for assistance; we filled out your hardship package TWICE and never heard from you guys, and every time we've called we've been told that our case has been turned over to someone else and that someone else is off today so we'll have to call them tomorrow." Then I asked to speak to her supervisor. Her supervisor Ashley informed me that we should call the sheriff's office to find out when we actually have to be out of the house and if we can get and extension. I said, "You're telling me that YOU can't tell me, and no one there at Citimortgage can tell me when we're supposed to be out of the house." She replied, "Yes." So then I said, "Hey, are you guys hiring? Because I need a job and I could come sit down there and not know what I'm doing for ten or twelve dollars an hour." I SERIOUSLY SAID THAT, I AM SUCH A BADASS. So I called the sheriff's department and they had no idea what I was talking about and I spoke to three different people including SMALL CLAIMS (a mortgage? small claims? seriously?) and probate and nobody knew anything about it. So now I've called the attorney again and left a message and I'm waiting to hear back.
DO NOT, FOR THE LOVE, EVER GET A MORTGAGE THROUGH CITIMORTGAGE. PLEASE. FOR YOUR OWN SAKE, DON'T DO IT.
Also, last night, Jason's ex-wife's husband started sending him threatening text messages about how he's coming to our house and Jason is a "jackass" and a "sorry ass". Oh, and I haven't even told you the half of what's been going on. I've been debating how much I'm going to write here about what's been going on with Jason's kids, so suffice it to say that everything is all messed up and the blame falls on me, on my being scary and threatening, and now my husband can't spend time with his kids and my son can't spend time with his brothers because of it.
All else I know to say on that is, 1) I am proud of this blog. I love to write, and I like everything I've written here. I enjoy every one's comments, whether good or bad, and I like knowing that people are looking at this blog. I don't regret the things I've written here because I am allowed to express love and exasperation and I am allowed to use sarcasm and exaggeration when I do it; I am allowed an opinion. If you don't like my opinion, don't read my blog. 2) I love Kane and Jude, tons and tons, more than I am capable of expressing here, and I have always treated them with love and respect and the things that I've written here about them speak to how deep and real that love is. Sometimes I write about day-to-day things like SOCKS! and COATS!, but I haven't written anything on this blog about any of that stuff that I haven't said out loud to Kane and Jude. And 3) I don't write this blog for children to read. The internet is a big, scary place and there is a lot of stuff out there that isn't for children. My blog certainly isn't the worst of it; there are all kinds of things scarier like PORN and CARROT TOP and REPUBLICANISM that kids could be looking at, but all the same, this blog is not for kids.
So, I think that about gets us up to speed. Thoughts? Questions? 'Ludes?
Well, on Friday we got a letter in the mail that our house has been foreclosed, and that we have ten days (until October 10th) to vacate. PARTY, right? So we've been planning and packing and trying to figure out how to fit all of us into my mother's house. It's not that small of a house, it's just the plan of action, and figuring where to put all our shit- really that should be ALL OUR SHIT EXCLAMATION- once we get there.
So this morning I called the lawyer for the mortgage company to find out if that date, October 10th, was the definite date we had to be out, because if we could get even a couple more days it would make things so much easier for us. The attorney said that we should call our mortgage company and ask for an extended vacate period, that they do that all the time, that it's nothing out of the ordinary. So I called Citimortgage at the number he gave me and spoke to Avery, who had no idea what I was talking about, and that I should call Joe X- I'm not shitting you, JOE X is who I should talk to. So I called the number Avery gave me for JOE X, and Kathy answered and said she had never heard of JOE X, and that the number I called was her direct line and she had never heard of a JOE X and that she doesn't work with loans and I could try Safeguard, the property management company. So I called Safeguard, and the girl there told me they had nothing to do with any of it, and I should talk to my mortgage company. THANKS. So I called the mortgage company again and spoke with a girl who said that there's nothing they could do; had we asked for assistance they might have been able to help us out. I said, "We DID ask for assistance; we filled out your hardship package TWICE and never heard from you guys, and every time we've called we've been told that our case has been turned over to someone else and that someone else is off today so we'll have to call them tomorrow." Then I asked to speak to her supervisor. Her supervisor Ashley informed me that we should call the sheriff's office to find out when we actually have to be out of the house and if we can get and extension. I said, "You're telling me that YOU can't tell me, and no one there at Citimortgage can tell me when we're supposed to be out of the house." She replied, "Yes." So then I said, "Hey, are you guys hiring? Because I need a job and I could come sit down there and not know what I'm doing for ten or twelve dollars an hour." I SERIOUSLY SAID THAT, I AM SUCH A BADASS. So I called the sheriff's department and they had no idea what I was talking about and I spoke to three different people including SMALL CLAIMS (a mortgage? small claims? seriously?) and probate and nobody knew anything about it. So now I've called the attorney again and left a message and I'm waiting to hear back.
DO NOT, FOR THE LOVE, EVER GET A MORTGAGE THROUGH CITIMORTGAGE. PLEASE. FOR YOUR OWN SAKE, DON'T DO IT.
Also, last night, Jason's ex-wife's husband started sending him threatening text messages about how he's coming to our house and Jason is a "jackass" and a "sorry ass". Oh, and I haven't even told you the half of what's been going on. I've been debating how much I'm going to write here about what's been going on with Jason's kids, so suffice it to say that everything is all messed up and the blame falls on me, on my being scary and threatening, and now my husband can't spend time with his kids and my son can't spend time with his brothers because of it.
All else I know to say on that is, 1) I am proud of this blog. I love to write, and I like everything I've written here. I enjoy every one's comments, whether good or bad, and I like knowing that people are looking at this blog. I don't regret the things I've written here because I am allowed to express love and exasperation and I am allowed to use sarcasm and exaggeration when I do it; I am allowed an opinion. If you don't like my opinion, don't read my blog. 2) I love Kane and Jude, tons and tons, more than I am capable of expressing here, and I have always treated them with love and respect and the things that I've written here about them speak to how deep and real that love is. Sometimes I write about day-to-day things like SOCKS! and COATS!, but I haven't written anything on this blog about any of that stuff that I haven't said out loud to Kane and Jude. And 3) I don't write this blog for children to read. The internet is a big, scary place and there is a lot of stuff out there that isn't for children. My blog certainly isn't the worst of it; there are all kinds of things scarier like PORN and CARROT TOP and REPUBLICANISM that kids could be looking at, but all the same, this blog is not for kids.
So, I think that about gets us up to speed. Thoughts? Questions? 'Ludes?
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