Friday, January 23, 2009

Do you like sex and travel?

I'm going to get my passport this afternoon. It's only turning into kind of a pain in my ass, but it'll be okay. I ordered my brand new birth certificate off the internet last week seeing as how mine is just a copy of whatever was laying in the floor in Shreveport. I already got my passport photo from the drug store, and it looks TERRIBLE. So all is right with the world.

I'm starting to think a lot about packing for a nine day voyage to another country, and it baffles me just a little bit. Logically I'd really like to pack as little as possible, but I am TERRIBLE at packing light. I do a whole lot of, "Well, IF it gets chilly I might want this sweater, or I might want this one, but I might EVEN want this one here. And if it's sweltering I'll be needing these three tank tops for sure, but I might suddenly wish I had any one of these five here, so I'll take those, too. It will be warm so I'll take these flip-flops, but if my feet get cold I might want these sneakers. And if we get dressed up I may want any one pair out of these three pairs of flats. And I shouldn't go anywhere without Anal Ease, just in case."

You know how it is. Or maybe you're good at packing so you don't know, so just back off because I am anxious AND obsessive, a nasty mix that will result in Jason stealing the seat next to Chris on the plane so Kristi is forced to sit next to me while I wrap my entire body around her head and scream, "IS THAT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN? DID YOU FEEL THAT BUMP? WHERE THE FUCK IS THE DRINK CART?"

3 comments:

Thom said...

This site totally saved me time and space and you can, with practice, fit all of the items on his list into one carry on. I did.

http://www.onebag.com/

Anonymous said...

Oh, I'm the same way. I have a vision of what I want to look like at the beach, at dinner, etc--all requiring numerous costume changes. Of course, when you arrive, you wear the same 3 comfy shirts, etc. Maybe we can pack together more or less...

kat

Lindsey said...

When I went to Europe in high school, I packed, like, 8 pairs of plain white athletic socks, a grossly over-sized navy blue sweater (that was loosely knit to boot, for extra uselessness in the face of the ever-present and bitterly cold Slovakian wind), a pair of jeans, and a single red patent leather stiletto. This is, of course, an exaggeration, but it's really not far from the mark, and it's a lot funnier than admitting that I was a 16-year-old retard who spaced whilst packing for two weeks in the fall in central Europe. So now, every time I pack a suitcase, I'm still making up for it and I end up OVER packing. I never regret it, though, so carry on with your shoes and your cardigans and your 14 pairs of capri pants or whatever and just make Jason lug it in and out of vehicles and through various airports along the way. With all that sunshine and the miles of sandy beaches and kid-free hotel rooms and gallons of (hopefully dirt cheap) alcohol, I'm sure you'll be able to find SOME WAY to reward his efforts. :)