Tuesday, September 12, 2006

A Saturday at the Library.

So, Saturdays are sort of a free day for me here at the library. I'm here to supervise the work-study students, and mainly to act as back-up should one of them call in or not show up. I basically spend the day sitting in the back at my desk, internetting and drinking coffee.

Which brings me to my subject today: coffee. Specifically, how the coffee here at work tastes like motor oil. MOTOR OIL, people. This particular brand of coffee-motor oil is so foul it makes my face spontaneously contort into pretzel twists of utter disgust. At first I figured that the taste was the fault of the person making the coffee; after making it myself a few times, I decided that it must the the 1990's appliance-of-death that brewed the coffee that was making it taste so fiercely grody. After a few months of drinking the motor oil and assuming that my face would never regain its once-cute regularity, I started making a pot of coffee at home, and bringing a to-go cup with me. This, besides being a pain in my ass, was irritating for several reasons. First, I really don't need one more thing to carry in the morning. I'm usually running late anyways, what with the 87 ankle-biters whom I have to take care of in the mornings. Second, the coffee was always luke-warm by the time I got to work. Third, I DON'T NEED A THIRD BECAUSE THE FIRST TWO SUCK BADLY ENOUGH TO RUIN MY DAY.

Well, as we all know, my perfect car was wrecked a couple of weeks ago, and my only two to-go cups are in it. At the tow shop. In Vestavia.

SO, I decided to dedicate my Saturday to figuring out how to make a decent pot of coffee in this crappy, old coffee maker, for the love of buddha on a pogo ball.

I started with the two, old, nasty carafes that my boss insists on putting the coffee in. I had noticed that they were moderately to extremely brown and gross looking on the inside, but the hole in the top was too small to fit my hand in (that IS what he said, after all), so I hadn't figured out how to scrub them out. I filled them with soap and hot water and let them sit for a few minutes. It was only after I had done this that I decided to document this whole endeavor with my trusty camera. Witness, the inside of one of the carafes AFTER it has soaked- still partly nasty and brown:




THEN, I discoverd my trusty tools upstairs in the break room- meet brush and rag:



I went to work on those carafes like they have never been worked. I scrubbed and picked and scraped and rinsed, until, OH MY GOD!! They're SILVER on the inside!!!





Next, I laid my wrath upon the coffee pot itself. I scrubbed it, rinsed it, scrubbed it, scrubbed it and rinsed it again.


Then I proceeded to run EIGHT TWELVE-CUP POTS OF WATER through the coffee maker, one right after the other.

After this was done, I figured I should make a tiny, two-cup pot of coffee to relish in my success. Here is the small cup of coffee I poured myself:


And here I am, cursing the coffee gods for forsaking me so. It still tasted like shit. Er, motor oil.


Oh, well. It passed the time.

EDIT: I am posting this with links to the pictures because, for some reason or another, I can't get the pictures uploaded onto the blog. Sorry for the inconvenience. I'll try and fix it in the meantime.

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